This week, in sunny Charlbury, smallest sprat took a tumble down the rather steep Victorian stairs. Running to his rescue, I had, at that precise moment, chosen to gargle with some mouthwash. Cheeks bulging, I picked him up, caught the (cobwebbed) ironing board in danger of falling on him, then sprinted upstairs to expel said mouthwash. Sadly, I did this in such haste and with such force that it shot into the basin and promptly bounced back and hit me in the eye. Clutching my weeping eye, I descended the stairs to comfort sobbing Joe, trying not to sob myself.

Some little time later, I’m sat (with reddening eye) in the local hostelry waiting for Big Sair. It was empty. I’d booked a table. No-one else had booked a table. Big Sair came in went to the bar asked for a table booked under my surname (Mackerel, of course), they sent her away. I had of course booked it in my first name (Mrs).

Big Sair leaves local hostelry thinking Mrs M is absent/late/fallen in the river. Cue lots of door swinging, which is all I can hear from my lonely table tucked away in the corner for sad cows. Meanwhile, Big Sair goes to another pub, my home, back to the pub I’m in… Farce? Blimey in a town with a population of less than 4,000, I was lucky to ever see her again.

Cheers!

Mrs Mackerel

Long ago, in a far away land called Oxford, I first met MM. I used to go to sleep very late to this album by (the perhaps appropriately named) Therapy? I don’t think MM or my flatmate found it particularly restful, but at least MM found it quite endearing. For a while.

And it only seems fair that after her great endeavours to find me that I dedicate a song to Big Sair this week. As It Stops Raining is by Georgia’s Horse, at the opposite end of the musical spectrum to its predecessor. Perhaps if we’d contacted Georgia and used her nag, we might have found each other slightly more quickly. It’s just a thought.

Download Therapy? – Teethgrinder mp3 (from Nurse)

Download Georgia’s Horse – As It Stops Raining mp3 (from The Mammoth Sessions)

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